When Candice and I started dating in 1999, same-sex marriage wasn't an option. Actually, the very idea of getting legally married seemed like an impossible dream. That is why when it did become legal in 2004, Candice and I didn't rush in. In truth, the idea of marriage was a little frightening to me. When we did get married on September 30, 2006, we had a small ceremony at the Red Lion Inn in Stockbridge, MA. It was such a beautiful weekend and one of the most special days of my life. I married the love of my life and my best friend. After we got married, I had no idea why I was ever scared in the first place. Getting married didn't change our love or make it magically more powerful but it did change how others viewed our relationship.
I feel so blessed to live in a state that was to first to recognize the importance of marriage equality. In truth though, I never thought our marriage was "equal" to most marriages in this country. In fact, I always thought Candice and I had a far "superior" relationship. We took turns going to graduate school, joined a crazy flag football team where we met most of our best friends, love spending time with our families, we enjoy our jobs and our home, we love to travel, run, hike, bike, kayak and even recently took up camping. We even decided to really go "all out" with the stereotype and buy a Subaru this past fall for our outdoorsy lifestyle!
Sure we had our moments like every long-term relationship where we needed to work a little harder. When times were tough we leaned a little harder on the humor. This hasn't changed during the past month and during this time of "sickness", I can tell you that I have never loved Candice more. She has not once complained and when I asked her why, she simply said "what's the point". Over this past month, Candice has become my hero, my strength and my pride! She has remained positive and has been the light during a very dark time.
We aren't perfect but we are perfect for each other. Each night, I have gone to bed thinking of my treasure chest full of memories. This blog can't do it justice, but sharing a little bit has helped me cope.
The love and support of our friends and family has been tremendous. There is not enough room for all the acknowledgements and I fear leaving someone out-but you know who you are. Thank you for being there to support our love and our marriage.
"9 out of 10 children get there awesomeness from their aunts"
I have thought about this particular topic for some time. But I must admit it is a difficult topic. Being an aunt has been one of the most important aspect of our lives since Sarah was born 10 years ago. Candice loves Kearin and Sarah with her whole heart. We have spent a majority of our vacations traveling and visiting our nieces and have many cherished memories. In the last year alone we went to Aruba with Kearin and Disney with Sarah. For Candice being a great aunt was natural. She learned from the best; Aunt Maureen. Aunt Maureen isn't just Candice's aunt, but our nieces Auntie and pretty much all our friends.
Candice and I loved to run together (well mostly she would run ahead of me). We ran in a lot of places that not only provided physical but spiritual fitness for us both. A few of our favorite places:
In our Neighborhood: Forest Hills Cemetery, Jamaica Pond, The Arboretum
In our travels: Aruba (barefoot at sunrise) Pebble Beach (in picture), Bermuda, Provincetown, Central Park, and Sedona.
This picture was taken when we visited Block Island this past summer (2013) with Candice's Dad. It was a very special day for the three of us and the weather couldn't have been more gorgeous and the bike ride was one of my favorites. We loved it so much that we picked another weekend and went to Martha's Vineyard too! I am so so happy that Candice and I got to spend such beautiful days this past summer with Papa Dennis.
"Oh but we do laugh" ....Candice is one of the funniest people I have ever known. Her quick wit has always amazed me and is one of many reasons I fell in love with her. I can't recall a day that she didn't make me laugh with some “punny” repertoire. While Candice has been in the hospital she has continued to make me laugh daily. She amazes the doctors and nurses with her quips. I am trying to write down her jokes as they come, but they are so often and my memory isn't terrific. However I am sure visitor may recall a few and may want to comment on this topic themselves.
Today I am thinking about my typical Sundays with Candice. We would watch Sunday Morning in bed and read the NYT. Get up leisurely and then take a walk with Parker (first into town to get a coffee and then around Jamaica Pond) no matter how cold or wet.
This was my favorite part of our weekends when we weren't off traveling. I really miss that time today.